I used to teach swimming lessons and the Wednesday of the first week of lessons was always called “Wicked Wednesday.” On Monday the kids thought is was GREAT and so much fun to come to swim lessons. On Tuesday they were sorta kinda okay about being there, but by Wednesday we had full out arms and legs flailing in the water, screaming, kicking fits. All because the realization had set in that these were swim LESSONS, not playtime. And that they didn’t really get to do what they wanted, they had to do what I told them to do (in the most loving, but firm way, of course).
Sweet Addison had that same realization today. After being super excited about Monday at school, and mostly excited about Tuesday at school (with the exception of the boy who keeps bothering her), today it hit! She mentioned a few times this morning that she didn’t want to go to school. “It is no fun,” she said. But I told her she got to go to computer this morning and she piped up a bit. Then again, “Mom, I don’t want to go today.” I could feel it coming. As we walked in we saw our friend, Micah, and that made that transition easier. When we got to the classroom it began. The tears were welling up for her and she kept whispering that she didn’t want to go to school. These were her profound words, “Mom, it’s just no fun here. Mrs. Moss doesn’t let me do whatever I want to ALL day. I can’t even get water to drink whenever I want it. And there isn’t anything fun to play with.” Whoa. . . that is the harsh reality of life, my sweet Addison. She’s really been living the life for the past 5 years, huh? I tried to (in one sentence) tell her that life is hard and we don’t always get to do what we want and that we don’t get to play all day either. And also remind her that she would have a great day and God would be with her wherever she is today. I know this routine because she is my child and I know how she operates. The longer I stand there, the worse it is for her. She wants to cling and as long as I am standing there, she has hope that I may take her away with me. So, even though I was in the middle of a conversation with Mrs. Moss I had to gently prod Addison in the door and give Mrs. Moss “the look” that said you better take her. I quickly walked away, thankful that my friend, Michelle, was right there so I could talk to someone and not cry for my sweet baby who did NOT want to go to school.
Truth be told, I would probably rather have her here at home with me. Ava Jane and I are not quite sure what to do with each other yet. She is used to Addison being here. I am used to Addison being here. But we will figure it out. And Addison will learn to LOVE school. I know it is just the “getting used to it” part that will be hard. So, I will be fervently praying for her and for me and for Ava Jane. That we will all “get used to it”! Here is a poem that Mrs. Moss gave the parents last Wednesday (Addison’s first phase in day with her teacher – only a half day of school). It made me a little sad then, but is much more real for me today.
The First Day
I gave you a little wink and a smile as you entered my room today.
For I know how hard it is to leave and know your child must stay.
You’ve been with her for five years now and have been a loving guide.
But now, alas, the time has come to leave her at my side.
Just know that as you drive away and tears down your cheeks may flow
I’ll love her as I would my own and help her learn and grow.
For as a parent, I too know how quickly the years to pass
And that one day soon it will be my turn to take my child to class.
So please put you mind at ease and cry those tears no more.
For I will love her and take her in when you leave her at my door.
So, now that you are probably crying like I am. . . say a little prayer for all the sweet kindergarten kids who are entering “Wicked Wednesday.” Tomorrow may be worse and then by Friday things may ease up a bit. Maybe it is for this reason right here that God had me teach swim lesson for those five years before Addison arrived. To be able to know and be prepared for Wicked Wednesday, and the days to follow. And to know how to encourage and love and support Addison through this season of learning and growing. And for those of you who have not sent your baby to school yet, be sure to mark down the first Wednesday of the first FULL week of school so that you can be prepared!!